Why I Love and Hate Christian Radio: Part I

I love Christian radio and I hate Christian radio. Specifically the Christian radio stations that play music. First, I love Christian radio because I can listen to it in my car without worrying about some idiot DJ saying something I don’t want my 2 year old to repeat. Second, I love Christian radio because one of the stations where I live doesn’t have commercials! Any other radio station plays 5 minutes of music and 15 minutes of commercials, so no commercials is a big plus. Lastly, I love Christian radio because it exposes me to Christian musicians that I would have never listened to otherwise.

Unfortunately, the list for why I hate Christian radio is a bit longer. I’m going to list a few general things I dislike and then in Part II, I will move on to the real reason I hate Christian radio. First, I hate Christian radio for the same reason I hate the Top 40 stations; because they play the same songs over and over and over until I throw up. I used to love the Newsboys. I find nothing wrong with their music nor who they are as musicians, but thanks to Christian radio I cannot stand to listen to any Newsboys song, ever. If a Newsboys song comes on the radio (and it does every time I enter the car) I will risk that idiot DJ on the other station for two and a half minutes, or if nothing else is on I’ll listen joyfully to the commercials. By the way, if anyone from Christian radio is reading, Casting Crowns are about to reach Newsboys status in the nauseatingly overplayed category, I’d hate to lose them too.

Another reason I hate Christian radio is because all of the Christian knock-offs of secular artists. I swear I just heard Maroon 5 singing about Jesus. Oops, that’s not Maroon 5? Who is it? Oh, you don’t know because everyone calls them “that Christian band that sounds like Maroon 5.” And if it isn’t a knock-off of a secular artist it is a knock-off a popular Christian artist. Wow, I love that new Jeremy Camp song. What? That’s not Jeremy Camp? You mean it’s another guy that sounds like he lives in the wilderness and smokes 2 packs a day? What’s his name? You don’t know and you can’t call him “the guy who sounds like Jeremy Camp” because there are four of them.

A third reason I hate Christian radio is the fundraising week. Don’t act like you don’t change the channel quicker than the DJ can say, “Without your support…” The only way I’d donate to my local Christian music station is if I were able to call the shots, but there is no way they’d let me do that because I’d throw out all the Newsboys songs, and then no one else would donate money because apparently the only people who donate to Christian radio absolutely love the Newsboys because that’s all they play.

So by now you must be thinking what does all of this have to do with sound doxology? Stay tuned for Part II!